Disputable Matters and the Church

This entry is the text from my message this past Sunday concerning disputable matters from Romans 14:13-23. I believe it to be a very relevant topic for believers today. Here you go:

This week I found myself lamenting over a conversation Pastor Andrew and I had.  We were talking about convictions that people in our church have that would fall under the category of disputable matters.  I caught myself verbalizing that the best thing is for people to probably avoid those conversations for the sake of peace.  But my own words did not sit well with me.  Avoidance does not help a relationship to grow.  The reason I even said that was because I feared people being ugly toward one another, not being able to have tough conversations about disputable matters without projecting their conscience about an issue onto the other person.  I began to lament because of all people, we should be able to have healthy conversations with one another regarding these issues without the fear of division.  Most of the time when we enter into a conversation about these issues, our goal is to seek to change the other person’s mind about their convictions.  We seek to win an argument, rather than seek understanding.  We have already made up in our minds how the other person is wrong, so we feel it’s our job to set them straight. I have had enough conversations with people who genuinely love Jesus and desire to follow His Word that come to different conclusions about disputable matters.  As a church… as believers in the Lord Jesus Christ, we are called to be one.  How do you do that we believers that think a bit differently than you on disputable matters?  Is it possible?  Yes, or it would not make sense for Paul to write Romans 24.  What is the way forward?  This morning I am going to answer one question for us from Romans 14:13-23.  Here is the question…

What Principles Should Christians Consider in Their Relationships with One Another Concerning Disputable Matters?

This is a crucial question for us to answer because avoiding one another and cutting off relationships with one another is not God’s way. Before I begin answering this question, I need to remind us what we are talking about when I use the phrase disputable matters.

• We are not talking about issues that are clearly defined as sin from the Scriptures. Many issues are just not disputable because the Scriptures are clear.

• Remember that the context of this discussion was about the role of the Law in the life of a believer. Paul states that some may hold strong convictions about not eating certain foods, not drinking certain drinks, or setting apart one day as more sacred than another. However, there are some believers who are fully convinced that they have freedom in regard to these issues. Paul makes it clear that neither person is sinning regarding their convictions. What he does conclude is that if either one of these believers holding to different convictions acts against their conscience, then it is sin for that person. So the sin here is violating one’s conscience is not the disputable matter itself. Going against your conscience in disputable matters is an act of rebellion in and of itself. When you make a decision to act on something against what you believe is the Holy Spirit's conviction, then you are rebelling against what you think is right, and thus violating your conscience. I think the saying, “when in doubt, don’t” applies very well here. If you have any doubt at all that what you may be doing could be wrong, then stop… don’t do it. Not because that certain thing is sin, but because violating your conscience is sin. Look how Paul puts it in Romans 14…

5 One person esteems one day as better than another, while another esteems all days alike. Each one should be fully convinced in his own mind.

14 I know and am persuaded in the Lord Jesus that nothing is unclean in itself, but it is unclean for anyone who thinks it unclean.

23 But whoever has doubts is condemned if he eats, because the eating is not from faith. For whatever does not proceed from faith is sin.

Paul recognizes the division that these disputable matters can create so he is addressing it here in his letter. Two weeks ago, Pastor Andrew laid a great foundation relative to this issue. He ended on Romans 14:12, which is a clear reminder to us that in these issues a person is accountable to God. We will all stand before the Judgment Seat of Christ as a believer and give an account to God.

I feel like it is important to talk about what Paul means by weaker and stronger Christians in this passage.

• When we see these words, we immediately think of inferior or superior language. Well, the weaker Christians are those who are legalistic and do not fully enjoy the freedoms we have in Christ. The stronger Christians are those who enjoy their freedoms in Christ and are more mature in their faith. This is not at all what Paul is trying to communicate. He is not using inferior vs superior language, he is simply referring to a weak conscience verses a strong conscience relative to particular disputable matters. It is entirely possible and likely that a mature believer’s conscious does not allow them to do certain things that a new believer may not have any issues with concerning a disputable matter. A mature Christian might struggle with listening to secular music, so they choose to only listen to gospel music. While another believer might be fully convinced that it is ok to listen to secular music. It is a disputable matter that boils down to conscience. The one who cannot in good conscience listen to secular music might be a very seasoned and mature believer, but for whatever reason their conscience doesn’t allow them to tune in the radio to classic rock. Does this mean that they are inferior as a believer? No, it simply means that they have a weaker conscience on this disputable matter than another. And furthermore, if they were to listen to secular music against their conscience, they would be sinning. Not because listening to secular music is sin, but because they were violating their conscience, which is an act of rebellion.

• Let me give you another example. A friend of mine who was a youth pastor in Pennsylvania could not in good conscience open or eat a fortune cookie, because of its ties to eastern religion. He didn’t look down on those of us that had no issues with opening up the cookie and having fun with the “fortune” stated on the paper. This friend loved Jesus with all his heart and was effective in ministry, yet he had a weak conscience relative to that particular issue. The rest of us had a strong conscience, meaning that we were fully convinced that it was not wrong for us to open up the wrapper, read the paper inside, and eat the cookie. This did not make us superior Christians. The issue was about one’s conscience. For my buddy to have a cookie, it would have been sin. Not because eating a fortune cookie is sin, but because he would be violating his conscience. So please guard yourself from thinking in terms of inferior vs superior when Paul uses weaker and stronger brother terminology.

One final piece to the context here that will help us understand this passage. When Paul started his teaching on issues of conscience found in the first 12 verses of this passage, his focus was on the one who passes judgment on those who seem to enjoying the freedoms they have in Christ, such as eating pork, or worse yet, drinking milk with their pork. Instead of passing judgement on those who were doing things they would not do or not doing things they feel they must do. Instead, trust that what their free brothers or sisters were doing was unto the Lord and let God sort all of that out as the one they will give an account to. However, the rest of the chapter seems to be focused on how the Christian with a stronger conscience should relate to their fellow believer with a weaker conscience. Both can learn from the principles that Paul lays out here, but Paul’s focus in today’s text is how the believer with a stronger conscience should relate to the believer with a weaker conscience. However, I think it is most beneficial for us this morning to focus on the principles Paul lays out here relative to Christians relating to each other when disputable matters enter the picture.

Now that I have defined issues of conscience and weaker and stronger brother terminology and explained the context of who Paul is addressing, I think it would helpful to lay out some of these potential disputable matters that are very real for us today.

• Believers have differing convictions about alcohol.
• Believers have differing convictions about the proper way to discipline children.
• Believers have differing convictions about vaccinations.
• Believers have differing convictions about schooling choices for their kids.
• Believers have differing convictions about music, TV shows, and movies.
• Believers have differing convictions about literature.
• Believers have differing convictions about worship style.
• Believers have differing convictions about modesty.
• Believers have differing convictions about how one should dress for worship.
• Believers have differing convictions about issues such as immigration, climate change, and the best way to help the poor.
• Believers have differing convictions about the Sabbath.
• Believers have differing convictions about meds such as anti-depressants.
• Believers have differing convictions about a church having debt.
• Believers have differing convictions about pacifism.
• Believers have differing convictions about things like social media.

The list could go on, and as you can see, there are many disputable matters that can cause division and destruction in the church if God’s people are not relating to one another according to the principles laid out in the Scriptures.

What principles should Christians consider in their relationships with one another concerning disputable matters?

Principle #1: In disputable matters place yourself in the role of a builder not a judge.

13 Therefore let us not pass judgment on one another any longer, but rather decide never to put a stumbling block or hindrance in the way of a brother.

We judge when we decide in our minds that someone’s faith is in question when they have a more narrow view on a disputable matter. What is a stumbling block? A stumbling block is any hinderance that you create because of how you relate to another believer relative to disputable matters. It could be placing them in a position where they are tempted to violate their conscience, or it could be wounding them by your words… whether through gossip, verbal attacks, or even social media comments. It could be avoiding a relationship all together with that fellow believer, and in doing so fracturing the body and hindering their growth in Christ. A judge seeks to condemn and point fingers and place themselves in a position of authority over that person’s life, as if they know better what it means to please the Lord. A builder seeks to humble themselves and work toward the edification of the other in Christ. Look what Paul says later in verse 19.

19 So then let us pursue what makes for peace and for mutual upbuilding.

Response: Be a builder not a judge.

This first principle is a reminder of who we ought to be in disputable matters, the next principle is a reminder of who others are in God’s eyes.

Principle #2: God loves your fellow brother or sister in Christ to death!

14 I know and am persuaded in the Lord Jesus that nothing is unclean in itself, but it is unclean for anyone who thinks it unclean. 

Paul affirms his convictions that nothing is unclean in itself, however, if a person another person’s conscience has determined it to be unclean for them, then it is actually unclean for them. Then he goes on to talk about the effects that stumbling blocks have on a fellow believer.

15 For if your brother is grieved by what you eat, you are no longer walking in love. 

He asserts a conditional statement. He says, if a person is grieved by what you eat, then you are no longer walking in love. In other words, if your responses to your fellow believer concerning disputable matters is destroying them and causing them hurt, then you are no longer walking in love… the very thing God calls believers to do. He then lays out the principle…

By what you eat, do not destroy the one for whom Christ died. 

You need to consider that God loves your fellow believer so much that He died for them, so to destroy them is to overlook God’s love for that person. Your conscience may be stronger in certain disputable matters or weaker for that matter. However, if your response to your fellow believer in destructive, then what you consider to be right for you in a certain disputable matter is actually being used for evil purposes, because it is evil to destroy your fellow believer because Christ died for them! This is why Paul warns in the very next verse.

16 So do not let what you regard as good be spoken of as evil.

If we stopped to consider the person and God’s love and action toward them as His child, then we ought not be so quick to judge, destroy, or tempt them to violate their conscience. They are loved by God, so don’t destroy them because your conscience concerning disputable matters is different than theirs.

Response: Walk in love toward the precious soul for whom Christ died.

The third principle we find in this passage is concerning the values of the Kingdom.

Principle #3: The values of righteousness, peace, and joy are more important than your conviction on a particular disputable matter.

17 For the kingdom of God is not a matter of eating and drinking but of righteousness and peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. 18 Whoever thus serves Christ is acceptable to God and approved by men. 

What Paul is saying is that you need to seek first the Kingdom. You need to consider the values of the Kingdom and let them drive your responses to others relative to disputable matters. He says that a servant of Christ is one who cares about being right with God in these matters, however, a servant of Christ is one who cares about being in a right relationship with their fellow believers as well. Our vertical relationship with God is important, but so is our horizontal relationship with God’s people. Therefore, Paul concludes in verse 19…

19 So then let us pursue what makes for peace and for mutual upbuilding.

In other words, make sure you consider the values of the Kingdom in your interactions with one another, and living at peace with one another even when we have different convictions about disputable matters is the Kingdom way. Division, destruction, cold shoulders, avoidance, disunity, harboring bitterness toward your fellow Christian is not! It is more important to pursue the Kingdom way than to project your convictions on to others relative to disputable matters.

Response: Seek first the Kingdom of God and avoid building your own kingdom.

This final principle is very similar to the previous principle, but it is more focused on what our responses toward one another will do to the work of God.

Principle #4: The work of the Lord is of greater importance than any disagreement over disputable matters.

20 Do not, for the sake of food, destroy the work of God. Everything is indeed clean, but it is wrong for anyone to make another stumble by what he eats. 21 It is good not to eat meat or drink wine or do anything that causes your brother to stumble.

So Paul says, don’t destroy the work of God over these disputable matters. Do you realize that in every believer the Holy Spirit is alive and actively a part of their sanctification. Paul says in Philippians that it is God who works in us, both to will and to work His good pleasure. He tells us that He who began a good work in us will carry it to completion. God is at work, but we can be a destructive force and find ourselves hindering God’s work in the life of an individual. But we can be a destructive force in God’s work in this world as well. Do you know what a divided church communicates to an outside world looking in? When we tear down one another over disputable matters, it affects the way outsiders see the Gospel. Do they see a gospel of grace? Do they see a gospel of broken people loving each other and forgiving each other because that is what Christ did for them?

Response: Consider carefully how your response to another believer relative to disputable matters will affect the work of God.

I mentioned earlier about the issues that can certainly bring division in a church or among believers in a local body, but quite frankly, there are greater realities that bind us together as one. It requires us to take a step back to understand our position, God’s people, God’s Kingdom values, and God’s work. We are called to live at peace. We are called to walk in love. We are called to seek first His Kingdom. Does this mean that we never have difficult conversations? No!

• It means that those conversations happen in a context of building one another up, not tearing one another down.
• It means that we treat each other with respect and dignity as God’s sons and daughters.
• It means that we evaluate whether our issues are truly sin issues or a disputable matter according to the Scriptures.
• It means that we give space for the Holy Spirit to work in our own lives and in the lives of others.

This is part of offering your bodies as a living sacrifice. This is part of considering others better than yourselves. This is part of loving one another sincerely from the heart. This is what it means to be the church in God’s Kingdom. Let us be a good church!